Update

I am back home in Columbus. I had pressing client business, and without having had the luxury of being able to plan to be away, there were things I couldn’t reschedule too well. So, we made the decision that I would fly back today, spend three days in the office taking care of what needs to be done, and then fly back to Philadelphia on Thursday, so that I can take care of some business matters for my dad. Susan and I will then drive home a week from today. She’s going to stay with my mother all week just to make sure that somebody’s keeping an eye on her and helping her out as much as possible.

My father had a serious dominant side cerebral hemorrhage on Wednesday morning. Fortunately, my mother recognized that the trouble he was having finding words was a significant problem and called 911. The paramedics got there quickly, and my parents are lucky enough to live just five minutes from a level-one trauma center, meaning that the hospital has a well-established protocol for elderly stroke victims. Within thirty minutes of the first symptoms, he was in a CT scan, determining the size and extent of the bleed.

The bleed was far enough to the outside that it did not affect his central nervous system. He never lost consciousness. The neurosurgeon told me that normally when he sees a bleed this large, the patient comes in in a coma and often never wakes up. Luckily, my father never lost consciousness, so he never had to go on a respirator or anything like that. He was always breathing on his own. He’s doing well enough that he was transferred out of the ICU and to the stroke unit 48 hours after the stroke. He’s alert, he’s communicative, he still has his sense of humor, and he’s eating. He’s definitely still in there. That’s the good news.

The bad news is that he has some very significant deficits on his right side. He’s having a LOT of trouble speaking. Some things he says are crystal clear, but others are completely unintelligible. He struggles very hard to find words and sometimes can, but most times can’t. He spent two whole days trying to ask me to do something for him until I finally figured out what he was asking me to do. It’s incredibly frustrating for him, and that’s tough to watch.

He also has some significant paralysis on the right side. His right arm was completely paralyzed until yesterday, when he suddenly got some movement back. He overdid it, though, and tired himself out and can’t do as much today. His right leg also has a major deficit, but he was able to bend the knee to 45 degrees repeatedly yesterday, and could also flex his toes and even press forward a little bit. These things ebb and flow. He will have good days like yesterday and setbacks like today, and we just have to learn to roll with the punches.

Only time will tell. The blood has begun re-absorbing, but it’s going to be some time–probably several months–until we know what the permanent result is. I seriously doubt he will be able to go home; since the docs expect he will be wheelchair bound, he will probably have to spend the rest of his days in a nursing home. But, at least he’s still with us. My mother is not in great health, either–in fact, she has lots of physical problems of her own. She’s very dependent on my father, and I really don’t know how she’s going to manage on her own. I suspect we’re going to have to look for a care facility where they can be together.

I’m an only child, and I live 400 miles away. I also have a business to run with clients who very much rely upon me, so I need to be here most of the time. Likewise, Susan’s in the process of starting up a business, so she can’t afford to be away for extended periods, either. The distance means that there’s only so much I can do. This is going to be an ordeal the likes of which I have never experienced and don’t know what to expect.

I want to thank everyone for the good wishes and expressions of support posted here. They’ve meant more to me than I can hope to describe, and I want you all to know how much I appreciate them. While I think my father is out of danger, please continue to keep us in your prayers.